I’ve always known what alcohol was right from my adolescent age. But I’m no drunk.
There were days I’d come across schnapps (not so sure of the spelling), the ones them ancient people used to drink with kolanut. Definitely not my favourite drink back then. There were days when I stumbled on Bailey’s likewise in the fridge, brrrrrrrr, that shii was heavenly. As a kid, I only tasted the sweet part of it and if you’ve taken it before, you’d know it’s best served cold.
I’m pretty sure I’m one of the many reasons dad stop placing his drinks in the fridge and inside his room instead, but it didn’t stop a brother. If you know, you know.
Dad’s a great man just in case you’re wondering. He’s no drunk neither.
Let’s get to the matter of the day then.
The day I got drunk.
Well, it has happened twice, so it would be the days I got drunk and from this point on, my English would be little less of no concern to me.
5 people happened to be in this little story of mine.
My guy J
3 other ladies
Then myself.
And plenty bystander watching the drama.
It’s not a bulletin, holding information. It’s just me sharing.
And it goes thus;
FIRST TIME EVER
This happened while I was still in school. 400 second semester I think, not that it really matters anyways.
I had this lecturer whom I thought might not get married ever!!! But the story isn’t about her either, but she actually turned out to be a sweet person after all.
I won’t use names, so please, try to keep up.
pretty hot afternoon in school that day. My guy J walks up to me that day and asks if I’ve gotten the trad (anko for the wedding) ready? I told him I’d have to go get it from the tailor because he said it was ready…… Fast forward to later that day, story cut short, the wedding was at Ibadan and I’d arrived in town. I called my guy J to know his location and he told me Genesis Hotel or something like that. I got bike and joined him there, only to see more of my course mates. Around 6 ish we went to get food, I bought pounded yam and efo riro with ponmo ((man must be filled up tonight)turned out to be my first mistake after all). I balanced it down then we went downstairs (the bar) to pass time.
Around 7 – 8 pm, my people started ordering drinks. They asked me what I wanted and I said Fayrouz please (they all laughed). I was there wondering what exactly was funny to them. If I’d known. First bottle landed, I think it was Mc Dowell’s if my memory serves me right. They were all drinking and gisting, if you don’t know me well, you’d think I’m quiet. I was only close with my guy J among all of us there so I was a bit quiet, I’m the shy type or I used to be or something like that shaa.
They started asking me why I’m not drinking, I was like I’m not drinking. I’m not really interested. That was how they vexed and carry my Fayrouz oh and mixed it with alcohol. I was like 😮😮😮😮. But why now? Before I could utter any other statement, they poured me a drink and I took like forever to finish it. But I didn’t even finish it before it was refilled (Fayrouz + McDowell’s). The first bottle finished them they ordered for 2 more (McDowell’s and Vodka) then I knew the night might not end well after all. I thought it only happened in Hollywood were the lady forces the guy to finish the drink in a cup. My people, it happened to me oh, like twice or more than sef. That was when it kicked in and where my night started. We’ve all heard of how strong Vodka is right…… Yeah, that stuff is powerful and I was taking it like water that night the McDowell’s too. My guy J on the other hand was a power house, I think he was used to it. So he drank less and danced more while I did the exact opposite of him. The result was clear at the end….. Then one of the ladies started acting up (drama was about to brew).
The first lady kept on saying she could see her fiancée somewhere around the corner that he was looking at us (that was a lie I think, she was probably drunk too, who knows?) but that was not the drama. The drama happened when we were about leaving, I was included in it also.
The lady stood up and was literally about to fall back down, then my guy J was able to hold her up, then she started shouting…. Don’t touch me, I can walk. Sure, we believed her so we left her alone. Until she went to meet a random dude with his babe I think and started yelling at him.
The stranger was lost, then we all went to meet the stranger to apologize on her behalf. All I can remember that I was saying to this man was….. We’re sorry sir, we are very drunk and at the same time, I’d also say we are not drunk. I’m sure the stranger would have been confused as heck….
Long story short, they had to carry the babe upstairs, yeah it was that bad.
On our way home, inside a Micra (those small cabs in Ibadan) around 12am, I was dizzy and nauseous as heck also. On getting to the bus stop, I just started throwing up all the precious pounded yam I consumed earlier during the day.
Imagine you sleeping and waking up just to go and puke up to 5 different times.
I went for the wedding, no hangover can hold me down!!!! But there was definetely no drinking.
I stayed away from booze, McDowell’s especially ( the stench alone gave me headache for close to 5 years).
Well, I guess that would be the end of the first episode.
I’d try to shorten the next one.
See you soon!!!!!
MonsieurFalu
Spikedspartan Blog 